


The earth has a lot of moons

by Remlundskan



Category: QI RPF
Genre: -Ish, Anal Sex, Angst, Blackmail, Blowjobs, British Comedy, Cheating, Drama, How could this possibly end well?, Katie finds out, Kissing, M/M, Mentions of F/M, Public Sex, QI, Rimming, The Jig Is Up, Voyeurism, because I say so!, it will, m/m - Freeform, or does it?, trouble ensues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-03
Updated: 2017-05-26
Packaged: 2018-08-28 20:53:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 10,683
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8462572
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Remlundskan/pseuds/Remlundskan
Summary: The cat's out of the bag. Katie finds out about Stephen and Alan. She decides to talk it out with the two of them.And then, she makes the suggestion.......





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [disaster7879](https://archiveofourown.org/users/disaster7879/gifts).



> Yes, I made another one!  
> Yes, this one is a sequel (of sorts) to the first one.  
> No, you don't need to read the first one to understand this one.  
> No, there won't be a third one!

Alan awoke to the wonderful feeling of a warm mouth around his cock. He groaned, still trapped in limbo between dream and reality and enjoyed what was being done to him. He couldn’t really remember at what time they fell asleep, but if this was the way that Stephen wanted to wake him up, then Alan was all for that.

“…so good…” he said, the words sounding a bit raw. He had done quite a bit of screaming last night. Stephen was a master at turning Alan’s brain to mush and it seemed like he wanted to start the day that same way. Alan wasn’t about to complain, though, it felt way too good.

The warm mouth went all the way down to the root, deep-throating him and Alan groaned again.

“…fuck, Stephen, please…”

The sweet suction stopped, lips still wrapped around him, and Alan pushed his hips off the bed, trying to persuade his lover to keep going. Instead the mouth was gone, leaving him cold and confused.

“Stephen, please, no teasing…”

He felt the bed move and opened his eyes, just in time to see his wife run into the bathroom and slam the door shut.

Katie!

Oh, fuck!

“Shit!”

He stumbled out of bed, his underwear still hanging round his ankles, making him hop, rather ungracefully, over to the closed bathroom door.

“Katie! Katie, open the door, please!”

No answer. In fact, it was eerily quiet from the bathroom. He couldn’t even hear her breathing.

“Katie? Please, just… Let me explain!”

A part of him really didn’t want her to demand an explanation, though, because he had absolutely no idea what to say, or how to explain. He loved Katie! Loved her with all his heart, she was his wife, the mother of his children… But Stephen was in his soul! Stephen made him burn, and ache, and feel like his insides were melting. He was hopelessly in love with Stephen. When that man was inside him, Alan felt more alive than ever before. He loved them both, and that wasn’t something you said to your wife.

“Katie?”

There was a retching sound. She was in there, throwing up. Oh, good, and he had been worried that she would react badly.

Mortified, he sank down on the floor next to the bathroom door, cursing softly as he pulled up his underwear. This was not how he wanted her to find out. Well, he didn’t really want her to find out at all, but he had always known that sooner or later, she would, somehow, found out about it. But finding out like this?

“Katie? I’m sorry!”

He heard her flush the toilet, then running water as she rinsed her mouth. He felt sick. He did that; he had made his wife feel like that. But it was a very complicated situation, and he had to make her understand. But how would he do that, when he didn’t understand himself?

“Katie…”

Somewhere in the distance, so far off that it felt like it came to him from another planet, he heard their children laughing and playing. Their children! The knot in his stomach grew until it made him feel out of breath. What was he doing to this family? To his wife, to his children! He was a horrible person, a terrible father and an even worse husband.

A small part of him reasoned that it was easy to think rationally when he was at home, with his family, because the second that he came within 3 meters of Stephen Fry, his insides turned to jelly and he forgot what the word ‘rational’ meant.

That was why it was a good thing to make all future decisions in the comfort of his home and not in the comfort of his beautiful lover. He made a firm decision right then and there, as he got up from the floor, to end things with Stephen, as quickly as possible.

And as soon as he had reached that decision, the bathroom door opened and Katie came back out. Her eyes were hard as steel as she looked at him, and Alan felt like the worst human being in existence.

“Katie, please… I’m ending it, I’m ending it today, I promise!”

“How long?”

“What?”

“How long has this been going on?”

“Four months… and six days! Katie…”

“Wrong!”

“I beg your pardon?”

“Wrong! This has been going on for years! This… thing with you and Stephen, that is something that has always been there, right from the start.”

“Katie, I swear to you, I never… We never…”

“But it was always there. For the whole world to see. I saw it, too!

“Katie… I promise, I’m ending it, I am putting an end to it, today!”

“No, you’re not!”

“I’m sorry, what?!”

“You are not going to end it! You are going to keep seeing Stephen, keep making him happy, whatever it is that you are giving him that he can’t get from his own husband, you keep doing it, because if you break his heart, you are going to break the show.”

Alan wasn’t altogether certain if he was staring or not, but there was a slight possibility that he was. Was she saying what he thought she was saying? She kept on talking, but too many thoughts were buzzing in his head to be able to focus.

“…Every time, every sordid detail, you’re gonna tell me how this all started and you are going to tell me who made the first move, who made the conscious decision to do something like this…”

Keep seeing Stephen? With Katie knowing about it? It was making his head hurt. Why would she want to know any details about what they had done, was it some form of punishment, that he was being forced to tell his wife about what he had done with his lover?

“…And I’m gonna want to talk with him, too!

Wait, what?

“Why?”

“’Why’?! Because Stephen is one of the most intelligent men in the world today, and I want to ask what possessed him to do something so fundamentally stupid as to move in on a married man.”

“He didn’t!” Alan protested, feeling the sudden need to defend his lover. It might have come out a bit harsher than he anticipated, though, and she gave him a look that he couldn’t really interpret.

“I beg your pardon?” she asked, and although her voice was hard, there was a trace of honest curiosity there, as well. Alan took a deep breath.

“He didn’t… make the first move, I did! I approached him, not the other way around.”

He remembered it so clearly. They had been talking, discussing the show, and the fact that Alan had ended up last, yet again.

“And me”, he’d said, “bending over in the Principal’s office, yet again!”

And then, it just came out, without him being able to stop himself.

“You know, I actually had a fantasy like that then back when I was in school!”

“Did you, now?”

“Yeah… You didn’t hear this from me…”

“Who else would I hear it from?” Stephen had pointed out, which, to be fair, was a valid point.

“I had this huge crush on one of my professors, right, and I would find myself… wondering what it would be like… just once… you know?”

All things considered, it started out fairly innocent, Stephen asking if he ever did anything about it, Alan admitting to being too nervous and then forgetting about the whole thing… and then asking Stephen if he could help out.

“Just this once, it’s not even… You’re just helping out a mate, that’s all, I just… want to know what it would be like… You know?”

To his credit, Stephen had refused at first, rather adamantly, now that Alan thought about it, and he realized now what he didn’t understand then… The reason Stephen had refused, was because of his feelings for Alan. Of course he refused, any sane man would have, but Alan had not been able to let it go. He didn’t even think it was that big of a deal (he was such an idiot), just helping out a mate fulfill a fantasy he’d had since he was in school.

Well, how was he supposed to know that his whole body would start burning the very second that Stephen touched him? How was he supposed to know that he would become addicted in no time at all to the feeling of that man’s hands on his body? Or his tongue… or his thick cock…

Alan gave an involuntary shudder as the memories washed over him, completely overpowering him for a few endless seconds.

“I see!” Katie’s voice cut through the fog and brought him back to the here and now. Alan realized that his eyes were closed and opened them to find his wife studying him, like he was some new, fascinating insect that she had never seen before.

“I’m gonna want to speak to both of you! Together! Here! Tonight!”

He wasn’t really in a position to argue.


	2. Chapter 2

”It’s alright, darling, you knew this would happen. Her reaction is perfectly understandable!”

Alan’s heart was pounding. Being in the presence of Stephen was making every cell in his body ache and it was nothing but extreme torture not being able to just jump into the other man’s arms and never let go. He was supposed to be rational; he didn’t feel like he had much of a choice after what happened at home, but he couldn’t really bring himself to care about that.

It wasn’t really his fault, though. Stephen was a magician. All he had to do was enter a room and every single person in that room would become enthralled. And that was the problem, wasn’t it? Stephen had put some sort of spell on him, rendering him completely senseless whenever they were in a room together, making him forget the things that mattered like his family, his wife, his cock in Stephen’s mouth…

Stephen was a drug and Alan was a helpless addict. There was no way he would ever be able to end things with Stephen, the man owned half of his soul. And Alan couldn’t give up on him, any more than he could give up breathing.

He wasn’t even aware that he was moving closer. Either that or it was Stephen. Whatever the case may be, they were gravitating towards each other as if drawn by some invisible force. It all seemed so natural, to take that final step, to put their arms around each other, to have their lips meet.

In a way it should be surprising, how he still felt that intensity, that burning ache inside whenever Stephen touched him, even after all this time, after all the moments of passion they had shared together, but it didn’t surprise him one bit, because to Alan, it was exactly how it should be, how it always had been and how it always would be.

“I love you!” the words left his mouth before he could stop himself. “Which is probably not something I should be saying right now, I know that, but I do, I love you!”

“I know! Oh, my dear boy, I know you do! I know we shouldn’t do this, but…”

Alan was already working on removing their shirts and trousers.

“Talk later!” Was all he said, moving his lips down over Stephen’s neck, just like he knew the other man liked it, while his hands were busy removing their clothes. They really didn’t have enough time, which was a pity, because he was in the mood for some serious love-making… or at least a shag, but they had barely ten minutes before they had to be on set. So Alan decided to settle for the next best thing and went down on his knees.

There was a low, moaning sound coming from Stephen that was absolutely beautiful. Every part of Alan was just itching to get that man inside him; his mouth was literally salivating at the thought. He couldn’t even remember his inexperience the first time he sucked Stephen’s cock. All he knew was that he liked it, he was good at it, and he liked watching his lover come undone before him when he did it. Doing a show now, in front of a live studio audience, and rolling cameras, knowing that he had been on his knees, giving Stephen Fry a blowjob not minutes before… His body trembled.

“You want me to suck you off, Stephen?” he asked, his fingers working their way inside Stephen’s pants, grasping the thick cock he felt. “Or do you wanna go out there… hard as a rock… in front of all those people, knowing that my arse will be waiting for you after the show?” He looked up at Stephen, marveling at hos he was the only one who got to see the great QI Master like this. It was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.

“Alan…”

Alan just about came in his pants. There was nothing he loved more than to hear Stephen say his name like that, it made his entire body melt.

“I do love it when you say my name like that!” He decided to take pity on his lover, knowing that he would never be so cruel as to leave Stephen so unsatisfied and force him to sit through an entire show… No, that wasn’t in him. Maybe some time, but not today. “And I love having your cock in my mouth!” He pulled Stephen’s pants down and swooped in, wrapping his lips around the head of the older man’s member. Never let it be said that Alan Davies was a cock tease. He would have smirked at that, if he wasn’t busy sucking.

He should probably find it weird that having another man’s dick in his mouth didn’t feel weird, but it had been months since he got over that feeling. Hell, it didn’t even feel weird the first time, he just did to Stephen what he liked having done to himself.

The thought of Katie came to him, for no more than two seconds, reminding him that there was something that he was supposed to remember, but he couldn’t think straight. He didn’t want to think straight. Right here, right now, they were alone in their own world, their own private bubble and no one was allowed to disturb that, not even his wife.

He kept going, bobbing his head up and down, occasionally opening his mouth to let Stephen see his own cock resting comfortably on Alan’s tongue. That always made him groan in the most amazingly hot way, and Alan did everything he could to hear that sound over and over again. He moved his tongue over the head, jerking it a bit, before putting it back in his mouth like it was a lollipop. And fuck, he loved the taste of that lollipop. It was making him shiver and his cock was so hard by now it was damn near hurting him.

Stephen wouldn’t be the one suffering through the show with a painful hard-on.

Alan would!

At least, that’s what he thought.

And then, Stephen started grunting. And thrusting into his mouth. And Alan’s poor neglected cock wept and throbbed so badly that Alan could feel it in his toes. He didn’t stop, though. He sucked Stephen’s cock, taking it as deep as he could without gagging, and with one hand, he teased the man’s tight hole with his index finger.

Stephen came with a cry of Alan’s name, way, way louder that he probably had intended, and Alan felt the cock in his mouth pulse and shoot cum down his throat and that was his doing. He made Stephen Fry cry out his name! The man he loved just came with Alan’s name on his lips! Alan swallowed, and sobbed, and came in his pants.

He would have liked more than just a few minutes to recover from something like that, but they didn’t have more than a few minutes. And Alan now had a big stain at the front of his trousers. If he went out there now, the whole world, literally, would know that he had just creamed his pants like a bloody school boy.

“I blame you!” he muttered, resting his head against Stephen’s leg, trying to catch his breath. He felt a hand in his hair, and came dangerously close to purring like a satisfied cat.

“Yes, dear boy, a lot of people do!” Stephen replied and he sounded a bit out of breath. And then, with just a hint of humor: “You might want to change your wardrobe!”

Alan wondered if he should feel embarrassed that Stephen saw him in this state, and then he figured that no, why should he? He had nothing to be embarrassed about. Even though his legs felt a bit wobbly, he still got up and looked at Stephen.

“Do you feel better now, darling?”

Better? Oh yeah, the reason why they were in Stephen’s dressing room at all, the fact that they were both bad men, and cheating husbands and that Katie wanted to talk to them. He had been all over the place when he showed up, frantically telling his lover that Katie knew everything and that he was a lousy excuse for a human and now… Well, now, even though he was in need of a wardrobe change, he felt a lot more relaxed and a lot surer of himself.

Katie knew! She knew and she still wanted him to keep seeing Stephen. He wasn’t really clear on that part or why she would want to know any details about their time together, but she was his wife and he loved her above everything and she was telling him to keep seeing the man he loved… above everything. Fuck, why did life have to be so complicated.

Stephen gave him a gentle kiss.

“I’ll tell them you’re running a bit late. Go change. We’ll talk after the show!”

Certain things never changed; Stephen knew exactly what to do and when to do it. Alan nodded and he really hoped that he wouldn’t run into anyone on the staff on his way back to his own dressing room.

They would do the show, and they would talk later. And then, Katie wanted to talk to them both.

What could possibly go wrong?

The show was a hit, as usual, and Alan came in last place, as usual. But in his defense, he’d had other things on his mind. He couldn’t help but wonder if the people in the audience or the people back home could tell that he was a bit distracted, even though it really didn’t matter. He was a professional; he knew how to make things look good, he knew how to make people laugh, even if he was somewhere else in his mind.

What he didn’t know, was how to explain it all to his wife. How could he possibly begin to tell her how Stephen made him feel? It took a long time for him to understand it himself, and even then, he wasn’t really 100 % sure exactly what it meant. He loved Stephen. Loved him with every fiber of his being, the man made him burn. How did you explain that to the woman who gave you three children?

What would happen if they just ignored her? Just went on about their business and just flat out refused to talk to her, refused to tell her anything. Yeah, ok, he wasn’t stupid, he knew what would happen, he knew she would take the kids and leave. She might not sell them out to the tabloids, she had too much respect and admiration for Stephen to hurt him like that, but she would absolutely divorce him. He would probably never see his children again.

Was it worth it? Was it worth the risk, risk losing his family, his marriage, to be with Stephen?

He answered that question without even thinking about it. Stephen was in his soul! No power on earth could make him give up on what they had, now that he finally had it.

“I’m not losing you, Stephen!” he said firmly, as he came out of the shower in Stephen’s dressing room, wrapping the towel around his waist. Stephen looked up from the paper he had been reading by the mirror and simply nodded.

“I know, dear boy! But you have to accept the fact that you might not have a choice in the matter. This is her game now, and we have to play by her rules.”

Alan sighed. Stephen was right. Stephen was always right. But Alan was not willing to accept anything just yet. They would talk to Katie and they would explain it to her… No, Stephen would talk to Katie and explain it to her, because she would listen to Stephen. Alan still didn’t know what to say to his wife, so he depended on Stephen to do the talking.

“We’re doing this together, Alan!” Stephen suddenly said, as if he had heard Alan’s thoughts. “You and me!”

“Yeah”, Alan agreed. Him and Stephen. Together!

What could possibly go wrong?


	3. Chapter 3

Alan was being torn apart. It literally felt as though he was being pulled in two separate directions. Actually, if he was being honest with himself, it felt like he was on trial. And maybe he should be. He had cheated on his wife. He betrayed the vows they made when they got married. He was a lousy human being, a terrible husband and a horrible father. What kind of man did something like that to him family? And for what? A cheap thrill?

No, not a cheap thrill. He took a deep breath and looked over at Stephen, sitting at the other side of the table. Stephen wasn’t a cheap thrill, being with him wasn’t just boredom from his conventional life. Stephen was the man he loved! Even now, with his wife sitting at the table with them, he felt that longing, that desire to touch and be touched. And it was killing him! Because his wife was sitting at the table with them, and that made him die a little bit.

If he looked at Katie, he felt like he was betraying Stephen. If he looked at Stephen, he felt Katie’s eyes in the back of his neck. It was nothing but pure torture.

“I don’t understand this!” he heard his wife say, and he wondered for a second if she was talking to him, if she had somehow heard what he was thinking about. “I mean… This wasn’t… How could you even… Why? Why would you… How could you… This isn’t right, Stephen, I expected more from you!”

“Katie…”

“No, she’s right! –You have to understand that we never meant to hurt you. This wasn’t supposed to happen at all, the fact that it did is utterly and completely my doing.”

“That’s not true!”

“I could have said no!”

“You did say no! I’m the one who pushed and wouldn’t accept it. –If you need to blame someone, blame me! I’m the one who couldn’t let go!”

“Alan… stop talking!”

Alan looked down at the hand suddenly covering his and his brain suffered a meltdown. Just a simple touch sent a burning sensation through his entire being. He gently moved his thumb to be able to caress that hand, not even knowing that he did so. His heart was beating in his chest and despite everything, despite the severity of the situation, despite his wife, he felt himself grow hard, his body wanting to be touched.

It was insanity, of course. Everything about his relationship with Stephen was insanity, he knew that. But he couldn’t deny what he felt.

Even though his wife was sitting at the table, watching him, probably thinking about various ways to punish him for what he had done to her. The guilt in his heart made him look up at his wife and found her looking at him, just as he suspected, but with a very strange look in her eyes. In fact, as her eyes darted from him to Stephen and back again, there was a hint of something that he had never seen in his beloved wife before and he wasn’t really sure if he liked it or not.

“Whether or not you pushed is not the issue here, darling. It’s the fact that I gave in. I should have been stronger. I failed! The desire to have that experience with you was too overwhelming. I should have known better.”

“Not only that, but you’re a married man yourself, Stephen. What the hell were you thinking? What will you do when Eliot finds out about this?”

“He knows!”

Alan couldn’t stop staring. This was news to him, and Katie was gaping at Stephen, like she couldn’t believe what she was hearing.

“What?!”

“Excuse me?”

“He has known all along. We have always been completely honest with each other, and I told him about my… feelings for Alan a long time ago. He encouraged me, and made me promise that if anything ever happened, that I would tell him about it. After our first… encounter… I told Eliot about it.”

“You… told… So… All this time… he has known about this? About us?”

“Yes!”

Alan put his hands over his face and groaned. This was too much information at once. He had not known about this. In an instant, the hand that was previously covering his hand was in his hair, moving down over his cheek, and Alan couldn’t stop a shiver of want.

“Could you not touch my husband like…” and then she paused, and that look in her eyes was back. “Actually… Go ahead! Touch him like that!”

“What?!”

“I want to watch you two together. I need to know what this is all about!”

“Excuse me?!

“You want me to keep this to myself and not alert the media? You want to keep this little… affair secret? Keep seeing each other? I want you to have sex! Simple as that! That’s a small price to pay, wouldn’t you say?”

“Out of the question!”

“Katie, please, you’re not…”

“Oh, I’m dead serious! As serious as divorce papers! Think about it; you get to keep this dirty little secret, and all you have to do is shag. It’s a win-win for both of you!”

“Katie, no, this is… No!”

“I am offering you a way out here, Alan; I thought that’s what you wanted? I would’ve thought that you would have jumped at the opportunity?”

Alan flew up from his chair, fighting the urge to wave his hands around as he went through a whole list of why this was a really, really bad idea. Mid-rant, he was suddenly silenced by Stephen, who also got up and walked over to him.

“She has a valid point, Alan! This is her game, we have to play by her rules”, he said, his voice not even shaking a bit. Alan was afraid to look at him. Being this close to Stephen was causing his body to react the way it usually did when Stephen was close these days. If he looked into those eyes, he would surrender completely. And he couldn’t do that. Not with Katie watching. The very idea was enough to make sure that he would never be able to get it up… But Stephen’s hand on his shoulder proved that he was wrong in that regard.

It was terribly confusing!

“I can’t do this!” he whispered, his voice broken.

“You can!" came the reply, just as low, but voice steady, firm, a voice you could always depend on, no matter what, both soothing and arousing. "Just close your eyes, and listen to the sound of my voice. It’s just you and I here, forget about everyone else. Just relax. You trust me, don’t you?”

What an insanely stupid question, especially from such a brilliant man like Stephen.

“I trust you!”

“Then close your eyes and follow my lead, can you do that?”

Alan closed his eyes and felt loving lips gently touch his.

“…yes…” It was a half whispered moan, but Alan didn't care.

“Good boy!”

***

Katie had had all day to work out something evil and completely devious and beneath her, both as a woman and as a human being, the perfect way to humiliate and ruin her husband for betraying her. She had plotted and planned for hours and had everything set…

But she found that she couldn’t bring herself to do it.

Because another idea took shape in her head in five seconds flat as she watched the change in Alan’s behavior as they sat at the table. He was mortified, she could tell, and a part of her was glad, but at the same time… She frowned a bit as she watched him shudder in barely contained ecstasy, simply from Stephen’s hand on his cheek. It was like watching him transform into someone else entirely, someone she didn’t recognize, a stranger wearing her husband’s face. And it was instantaneous; the very second that Stephen touched him in any way, Alan stopped being Alan Davies, her husband, the father of her children and he became Alan Davies, Stephen Fry’s lover.

And despite everything, despite how badly he had hurt her, she was curious. What was it about Stephen that could turn her husband into a completely different person? She couldn’t help but wonder if it was just sex, because the last thing she’d heard, Stephen had no interest in sex, at all. So what had changed? Could it be something else? But what? And why?

And that’s when she knew exactly what to do and she had thrown all her plans out the window.

She had to know! She had to see for herself.

It was as much of a form of punishment for Alan for doing this to her as it was to satisfy her own curiosity. She wasn’t stupid; she had always known there was something going on between the two of them. Their chemistry on-screen was part of why QI was such a hit, that was no secret and Katie was a very intelligent woman; she knew perfectly well what would happen to the show if she forced them to break it off. If they suffered, the show would suffer, no matter how talented they were at keeping a straight face in front of the cameras. The tension would be there for all to see…

So, she had to let her husband keep his sordid affair, then. But not without him knowing that she was the one holding the cards in this game. She owned them now, and she wanted her puppets to put on a show so that she could understand. It couldn’t be looks, because although charismatic and funny, neither one of the two men would be considered attractive. Not that she married Alan for his looks; she wasn’t that shallow; she married him because she loved him, but even so… She knew what the ideal was these days, and neither one of them fit the profile. So what the hell was going on?!

It was hard to hear what they were talking about, their voices nothing but soft whispers, and she was just about to open her mouth to remind them that she was the one calling the shots, so she should be able to hear what they were saying…

And then everything changed and Katie knew that she wasn’t the one calling the shots anymore.

She wasn’t altogether certain exactly what had transpired, she couldn’t tell if they had said or actually done something, but without warning, a loud moan came straight from her husband’s lips. Her body reacted instinctively at the sound and she knew, right away, that she was in over her head.

Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea after all…

She told herself to get a grip, to focus, but they were making it hard for her…

Oh, bad choice of words, tremendously bad!

They had already forgotten that she was in the room with them, and it infuriated her. They weren’t really supposed to enjoy this, they were supposed to feel embarrassed and awkward and they were definitely not supposed to be standing in the middle of her kitchen, kissing like a couple of horny teenagers. They had forgotten that this was her game, her rules, she was the one calling the shots… Ok, they were getting undressed! In her kitchen! She got up, desperate to move them to the bedroom, or at least a room where people wouldn’t be able to see them through the window, but they were already moving. They seemed to move without even touching the bloody floor, like they had plenty of practice in this particular department, and that infuriated her even more.

Clenching her hands into fists, she followed them, realizing that they had been thinking the same thing. Get away from the windows!

No matter what, she was bound and determined to see this through!


	4. Chapter 4

Katie was starting to seriously regret her suggestion. The problem was that there was a small part of her, somewhere deep inside, that didn’t. She did her best to keep that part of her quiet, though. She was literally watching her husband with someone else and that thought was in no way appealing to her. Especially seeing the way they moved together on the bed. If Alan had had the decency to look ashamed or at the very least have some form of reaction to the fact that he was cheating on her in the bed where they had created their youngest child. Hell, he had his face buried in one of her pillows; he must smell her shampoo or the laundry detergent… Anything to remind him of the fact that…

“… oh, fuck, Stephen… oh… fuck…”

She almost jumped at the needy tone. It wasn’t just that Alan was enjoying whatever it was that Stephen was currently doing… He was shaking, literally shaking with need. Katie realized that she was seeing a side of her husband that she had never seen before, and she wasn’t really certain if she liked what she saw. It was obvious what Stephen was doing; even though his head was buried in the crook of Alan’s neck, his hands were busy working Alan’s cock. Hell, he was jerking it like he knew exactly what to do, like they had been lovers for years instead of months.

“… yes… oh, god… yes, Stephen, please…”

Katie wrinkled her forehead a bit, wondering for about two seconds what Stephen had asked to make Alan respond like that, but she got her answer when he started moving on the bed, getting up on his knees in between Alan’s legs. Whatever she had been expecting, it wasn’t what happened next.

#

Alan had lost all sense of right and wrong. He wasn’t even sure where he was anymore. All he knew was that he was on a bed, he was naked and Stephen was sitting between his legs, bending down to suck his cock. There was a low moaning sound coming from somewhere close and it occurred to him that it might have been from him. Fuck, but Stephen was good at that. He knew exactly what to do to make Alan cry out for more. Not that Alan wasn’t half bad, himself, no, Stephen had told him so on numerous occasions, but it was hard to remember such details when your lover was trying to suck your brains out through your dick.

He reached out towards Stephen; he was too far away and Alan wanted a taste of his lover as well. It was a bit difficult to reciprocate when you couldn’t remember the words. He remembered Stephen’s name, though. And he remembered ‘please’. And so, he used those two words, over and over, because he couldn’t think of anything else to say that mattered.

There was something that he was supposed to remember, he knew that; something important. Somewhere, in the back of his brain, he thought he saw a face, but it was blurry and impossible to tell whether or not it was someone he knBLOODY HELL!  
He couldn’t stop himself from shouting when Stephen, unceremoniously, left his cock in favor of his hole and started rimming him like it was the last day on earth and they only had a few minutes left to live. Alan accidentally bit his own tongue, but not even the taste of his own blood in his mouth was enough to drag him from the fog in insanity and the almost desperate pleasure that he was currently experiencing.

“… so good… so good…”

If that meant that he felt good or that Stephen’s tongue in his arse felt good or that Stephen himself was so good at what he was doing, that was information that Alan’s brain couldn’t provide him with. He was burning again and he never wanted to stop. How was it possible that he still felt this ache, after all these months? It made no sense to him.

“... fuck… Stephen, please… just fuck me, right now… I need you so bad…”

“Easy, now, darling, all in good time”, Stephen said, but Alan wasn’t really listening to reason at the moment.

“Give me your cock, Stephen, don’t fucking tease me, just give it to me!”

He gave a loud groan as the tongue was replaced with first one, then two fingers. They had done this so many times by now, that Alan was starting to wonder if Stephen someday would be able to fuck him without any preparations at all, just pushing his fat cock inside… Alan shivered at the thought. Another finger was added and it was not enough. It was sweet, but not the burning intensity that he was hoping for. He kept on begging, wanting more, but Stephen kept him right on the edge, sometimes teasing him with his tongue while fucking him with his fingers. Alan had no idea how long this went on; it could have been minutes but it felt like hours and he could literally feel his entire body melting under the experienced hands of his lover.

“Stephen… please… please… give me your cock, Stephen, make me yours…”

As he finally felt the head of Stephen’s hard cock finally push against him, he heard Stephen’s voice in his ear:

“Haven’t you always been mine, Alan?”

Alan made a sound like a wounded animal, his body responding to the feeling of being penetrated; the feeling of giving up control to another person, to Stephen Fry, of all people, the man who owned his heart, the feeling of belonging to someone so completely, giving them both body and soul, and he would not have been able to stay quiet if his life depended on it. Stephen knew exactly how to push and how to pull, knew exactly how to move to make Alan feel like he was swimming in hot, molten lava and loving every second of it. It made him feel more alive than anything else in the known world.

“… I… hnnngh… fuck… oh, fuck, Stephen, I love you, I love you so much… oh, fuck, please, yes…”

He felt Stephen slow down, just a fraction, knowing that it would drive Alan almost straight to the brink of insanity, and it worked like a charm, just like it always did. Fuck, but the man was a master at everything he did.

“You need to breathe, darling?”

“Fuck breathing, keep going!”

But he did take a few deep breaths, to accommodate his love, and true enough, Stephen started moving again, a bit faster, and Alan went back to his begging and grunting. If there was a way to freeze time, he would do so now, just stop the world from turning and stay in this moment for the rest of his life.

#

Katie wasn’t sure exactly when this had gotten out of hand, but she understood now, and marveled at her own inability to see it sooner, that this had never been her game. She had never had any cards to play, because this had never been a game.  
Her husband was in love with another man!

And there was nothing she could do about it.

She had expected this to be awkward, for them to feel embarrassed and ashamed. She had hoped… Well, it seemed stupid and childish now, but she had hoped they wouldn’t even be able to get it up, knowing that she would be there all the time, watching them. She had hoped it would give her husband enough of a guilty conscience that he would do whatever she told him to do.

Oh, how wrong she had been.

This wasn’t just about sex, she knew that now. This wasn’t just some desire to try out something new or experiment or even just having an affair to spice up his life…

They were actually in love with each other!

She watchedm move on the bed, watched her husband moan every time Stephen pushed inside... They were taking their sweet time, too, like they had no concerns, nothing to worry about, all the time in the world. Every now and then, Stephen would pick up his pace and a small part of Katie actually wanted to gasp along with her husband. They had never tried sex... that way... before, but judging from the noises that Alan made when Stephen fucked him like that, it was the most intense thing he had ever experienced. 

And that was another thing! According to them, they had been doing this for almost five months... If this had just been a fling, surely the magic would have left by now? And yet, she saw her husband stare into the face of his lover with a look in his eyes as if he was staring at the face of God. And wasn't that ironic?

The way they moved together, the way the talked to each other, the way they touched… Every single thing they did spoke volumes of their feelings for each other. Even though some words were too low for her to pick up, some were all but shouted and Katie thanked her lucky stars that the kids weren’t at home. Her parents had not minded one bit taking the three little ones overnight and she was immensely grateful for this right now. Because she would have been mortified if they had heard or, heavens forbid, seen their father in such a state. Didn't it make him feel like less of a man, taking it like that? She shook her head slightly, it sure didn't sound like it, from the way he was urging Stephen to keep going, it sounded like he was enjoying himself immensely.

She had never seen Alan act the way he did, had never seen him this… submissive. Not with her, not ever. Was that it? Was it the loss of control? No, that wasn’t it, not with these two. This was something else, something deeper, something… that Alan was supposed to feel with his wife. With her! Not with someone he worked with.

So why didn’t it hurt more?

She had expected it to hurt more! She was watching her husband, the father of her children, obviously in love with someone else. Shouldn’t that be a bit more… upsetting? Wasn’t that what was expected of her? Wasn’t she supposed to rant and rave and throw things at them? Isn’t that what you do when your man is cheating on you?

But she couldn’t bring herself to do it. She couldn’t even bring herself to cry!

Because they were so… beautiful together. No matter how she looked at it, seeing them together seemed… right. Like they belonged together, like they were supposed to be like that.

She couldn’t even bring herself to hate them. Instead, she stood there, watching them, and finding herself wondering If maybe, they somehow could make it work. They even had her permission to keep seeing each other. Although, to be fair, she had a feeling they would have kept on seeing each other, no matter what she had said. She had noticed that at the table, the way they acted around each other, like there was a force field, pulling them together, relentlessly.

This wasn’t just love, it was chemistry!

They had always had chemistry, right from the start, and since she was being honest with herself, she was a bit surprised that this hadn’t happened sooner. Because the force field had always been there, for everyone to see, just like she told Alan. Well, maybe they both needed time, to come to the same page, before they did anything.

She couldn’t help but feel a slight fascination. She knew all the basics of gay sex, you didn’t get to live in this century and not have that knowledge, it was all over the internet, but it was one thing knowing about it, and reading about it… It was something else entirely to see it happen in your own bedroom. When one of the two men happened to be your own husband. So yeah, it was fascinating, having this rare opportunity to watch him come so completely undone, in a way that he never had with her. He literally offered up everything he had to Stephen, hell, Stephen actually had him begging for it. It almost made her smile. And then, she realized what the situation was, and she stopped herself.

The thing that bothered her a bit was how many times she could hear Alan tell Stephen that he loved him. She got it the first time, she didn’t need to be reminded of the fact that the man she loved was in love with someone else. A part of her wanted to tell him to shut it, but there was a bigger part of her that knew it wouldn’t do her any good. He had forgotten that she was even in the room with them, nothing she said or did would make a difference right now. If she had said something sooner, perhaps, but it was too late now.

There was another part of her that demanded attention as well, but she did her best to ignore that part. It was the part of her that let all those sounds, all that moaning and groaning and grunting get to her and affect her in a way that was incredibly inappropriate. She had been ignoring it for a while now, probably ever since those two ended up in bed together and would continue to do so, no matter the cost. She, very stubbornly, ignored her shaking legs and sweaty palms, it was completely irrelevant, not to mention wrong, to feel anything even remotely similar to arousal in this kind of situation.

Alright, she wasn’t really certain exactly what the proper procedure was in this kind of situation. She didn’t even know if there was such a thing as things kind of situation. It just came to her, out of the blue, not even knowing if she wanted them to accept or refuse, and by now, it was too late to back out. They were having, thanks to her husband, really loud sex and it was affecting her. No matter how badly she tried to ignore it. And it surprised her, in a way, because she had never been one of those who found gay porn arousing. Well, she didn’t find any kind of porn arousing, really. But she was definitely feeling it now. Was it because of Alan? That her body was so used to responding to him that it happened on instinct?

Whatever it was, she ignored it, standing firm in the middle of the room, her eyes fixed on the couple on the bed. Cause that’s what they were; a couple. That was something she couldn’t ignore as easily as the throbbing between her legs. They were a couple, and somehow, they had to make that work, work out some kind of schedule, perhaps.

She couldn’t stop the tiny moan that escaped her lips when they came, though, because really, it would take a heart of stone not to be affected by the passion between them, the way they held on to each other as they finished, both of them gasping… She was a red-blooded woman, damn it, not a robot!

“You have ten minutes!” she said, trying to sound harsh, and failed miserably. “Get cleaned up and dressed and meet me in the kitchen!”

Not waiting for a reply, she turned and left, almost running into the nearest bathroom, locking the door and, leaning against it, shoved her hand down her panties, rubbing herself furiously.

Damn them!


	5. Chapter 5

Alan had never taken part in the Ice Bucket Challenge. He’d donated, definitely, but he wasn’t too keen on having a bucket of ice thrown in his face.

Hearing Katie’s voice, having just come down from a massive orgasm, must be what it felt like to literally have a whole bucket with ice thrown in your face.

He had completely forgotten about Katie. At first, he had been feeling like a fumbling idiot, everything he did seemed awkward, but Stephen’s voice in his ear, Stephen’s hands on his body, it had calmed him down, eased his mind and erased everything that wasn’t the two of them. By the time they landed on the bed, he didn’t even register what bed it was, just that his clothes were gone and he was with Stephen.

He had barely landed when her voice had cut through the fog and brought him back to the real world.

The world where he had just had sex with Stephen, in front of his wife.

He just got thoroughly fucked by his male lover, with his wife in the room, watching them. She would have heard him begging Stephen, demanding more, saying how much he loved him… Oh, yeah, he was a dead man, he knew that now.

He was a bit surprised that she had given them ten minutes… Hell, he was surprised that she hadn’t shot them both or at least thrown something at them. And that’s when he remembered that all this had been her idea. She was the one who suggested it. But why would she suggest something like that? Why torment herself like that? Why stay and watch?!

Alan sighed. Ten minutes to get cleaned up and get dressed, that’s what she had said. He opened his eyes, not even realizing until just then that they were closed, and looked at Stephen. For once, he had no idea what to say to the man. His mind was completely blank. All he could think about was how he would ever be able to make it up to Katie, and how she must feel right now. It became too much for him and he looked away, avoiding Stephen altogether, quickly getting out of bed and into the bathroom to freshen up.

He couldn’t even begin to count all the ways in which this was fucked up.

He loved Stephen! There really was no point in denying that, at least not to Katie, not after what she had seen and heard. He loved the man, heart, body and soul.

He loved Katie, too. She was the woman of his dreams, the mother of his children; she meant the world to him. She *was* his world!

He needed both of them. And he knew that was selfish of him, but it was the truth. He needed Katie in his life, and he needed Stephen, as well.

There was no way that this could end well.

After splashing his face with some cold water, he went back out to the bedroom to put on some clothes. As Stephen passed him to use the bathroom, Alan got a slight whiff of his cologne and every cell in his body reacted to it. He groaned slightly and started putting his clothes back on, flat out refusing to look at the messy bed.

There was a small part of him that felt like just putting on his clothes and get out to the damn kitchen, but he couldn’t make his legs move. Instead, he got dressed, and waited for Stephen to come back.

They were in this together; they should face the firing squad together.

\- - - - - - -

Katie sat by the table, her face blushing furiously. No power on earth would ever be able to convince her that they would not be able to tell what she had been doing in the bathroom. She suddenly hated them both with a fiery passion for making her feel this way. It was their fault, obviously! And she had to make them pay.

She knew now what had to be done. To be honest, she could have just done this at the very beginning, and saved herself the embarrassment, but thinking like that would indicate that the fault wasn’t entirely theirs and she needed to focus on that right now.

As soon as they came out of the bedroom, and she wanted to roll her eyes at the irony, she motioned for them both to sit down. This had to be done and it had to be done quick, and painless.

“I sure hope you enjoyed yourselves!” she said, biting her tongue the very second the words left her mouth. Of all the things to say…

“Did you?” Stephen (of course!) asked in return and she blushed even worse. Damn him!

“Here’s the deal!” She glared at them both, daring them to interrupt her. “Stephen, you’re leaving the show!”

“What?”

“I don’t care what you have to say” Katie went on, ignoring her husband, “or what you have to tell your bosses or the press and the media; you’re leaving QI. Let someone else take over. That’s the only demand I have! And no, Alan!” she went on, sounding more sure of herself now, “You are not leaving! You want to keep this little affair going? I already told you, you’re not leaving the show. Stephen, on the other hand… I want you gone! I am giving you two permission to keep seeing each other here, that should be enough. If what you have is really that strong, then this shouldn’t be a problem. I don’t want you two working together! You’re an intelligent man, Stephen, I’m sure you can come up with some excuse as to why you’re leaving. Maybe have a woman hosting this time. I’m sure you’ll think of something. You’ve done QI for what? 10 years? 13? It’s time to do something else. I’ll leave the details to you!”

She sat back, taking a deep breath, giving them a few moments to process this. That actually felt pretty good. She felt proud of herself. If they really cared for each other the way they said they did, then this wouldn’t be a problem. And if it turned out to be a problem… Well, that wasn’t really her problem, was it? She was the victim here; it was her husband that was cheating, she was just trying to save face.

Some part of her understood that they might a few minutes to discuss this, which is why it took her completely by surprise when Stephen almost immediately said:

“Alright, that’s fair enough! I accept your terms!”

“What?!” came from Alan again. Out of the two of them, he was the one protesting. For some strange reason, Katie didn’t find that strange at all. Stephen was smart enough to know who had all the cards and when it was time to accept surrender. Alan reacted passionately, because that was his nature. She knew her husband well enough to understand this.

“Thank you, Stephen, for understanding!” she said, trying to smooth things over. “I know this must be difficult for you, but I have made up my mind. I understand and I accept that you have these feelings for each other. I can accept that the two of you keep seeing each other, provided that you keep it behind closed doors and that you won’t force me to watch the two of you together. I don’t think that’s too much to ask, do you? Given the circumstances, I think I am being extremely fair to both of you, considering!”

“More than fair, I understand!”

Katie nodded. It was always so easy to talk to Stephen, it was like he could see into your mind. It made her a bit more at ease, actually. He had a way about him that instantly made people feel better about themselves. In a way, she could almost understand what it was that had made Alan fall in love with him.

She mentally shook herself. She was supposed to stay furious, and this wasn’t helping. What the hell kind of magician was Stephen, anyway, to make her completely forget about that? It was impossible to stay mad at him. So she turned her attention to Alan. It was very easy to be mad at him.

“Well…?” she said, giving him an opening to either object or agree with her, both of which would probably infuriate her even more. Yes, it was much easier to stay mad at Alan; it was his fault, after all. He was a married man, a husband and a father; he should have kept it in his pants. On the other hand, perhaps it was a blessing in disguise that it was Stephen Fry and not some little trollop with big tits and a tight arse that would have blabbed to the press first chance she got. Also, Katie never would have made the suggestion she made before, had it been some strange woman that Alan was fooling around with. Actually, the fact that it was Stephen made it easier.

Alan wasn’t all too happy about her idea, she could tell, but he must understand that it was in his best interest to accept it. He got to keep the best of both worlds; Stephen and his job. Katie couldn’t help but wonder if he had noticed the fact that in all of this, she still hadn’t said a word about divorce. A part of her wondered if maybe she should, but she could not make herself say the words. She didn’t want a divorce. Despite everything, Alan was still her husband and the father of her children, and she loved him.

Maybe this was more her fault than anyone else’s.

“Katie, I’m sorry…”

“Yes, or no, Alan, it’s very simple! Just like the day we were married!”

He looked like she had slapped him in the face and she felt sort of vindicated. Good! He deserved it! Just because she was allowing this to continue, didn’t mean that she was gonna be nice about it.

“Yes!”

Of course, any other answer would have been a lie on his part. She knew he wanted this, no matter the consequences. Well, alright then! Maybe, now, they might actually get somewhere.

“Good! Now, if you don’t mind, Stephen, I would like to speak to my husband alone.”

“Of course!”

He didn’t even ask, he just got up and left the room to give them some privacy. Any other day of the week, any other situation, and Katie would have smiled at him. As it was, she turned towards her husband once more.

“Alright”, she said, leaning back a bit, “here’s your chance… Start talking! If you have something to say to me, do it now!”

\- - - - - - -

Alan knew there were plenty of things he could say, none of which would make things any better. His mind was still processing what had just occurred. Stephen leaving QI? What would that even look like? Who could possibly fill that position? Katie had been right, though, he had been on the verge of saying that he would leave as well; his instant reaction to the very idea of not having Stephen in his life.

Except that Stephen *would* be in his life. His wife… the woman he loved, the mother of his children, had just told him that she gave him permission to keep his affair with Stephen. And the only thing she asked was that they didn’t work together. Was such a thing even possible? Could they make this a reality? What was she thinking; that whatever was between them would diminish if they didn’t work so closely every day? Was she right? Was that her plan all along? To break them up by separating them?

Too many questions. And he didn’t like questions he didn’t know the answer to.

“I love you!” It was the only thing he could think of to say at the moment. Because it was true, he did, and he would never stop.

She didn’t say anything in reply, so he tried to think of something more to say. And when he opened his mouth, the words seem to come from nowhere:

“I mean it! Katie, you’re the love of my life, you have to know that! And none of this, none of it, is your fault, this is all on me. I’m the one who messed up, I’m the one who’s been cheating and if there were any way that I could go back in time and fix things…” 

He sighed. Of course he wouldn’t. 

“I wouldn’t! I’m sorry it happened but I don’t regret it happening. I can’t explain what it is between me and Stephen; sometimes I honestly don’t understand it, myself, but… He makes me burn, Katie! He triggers something deep inside of me that I didn’t even knew I wanted. I have no control when I’m around him, he’s in my blood, in my soul and I… it’s like I can’t function properly without him. I love you, Katie! But… I love Stephen, too! I do, I love him, and I… I know you are right, I know this is the only solution to our problem, and I know that this is killing you, but… I just need to know, Katie, please… Are you… Do you…”

He couldn’t bring himself to say it, but she had always been a very bright young woman, she must know what he was after.

“I’m not gonna file for divorce, Alan! For a lot of reasons! I should have seen this coming a long time ago, but I didn’t. I knew it was only a matter of time, but I chose to ignore it… You’re my husband, Alan, when I said those words to you, I meant it. Till death do us part. And if Stephen has to become a part of that, then…”

“Wait, what?”

“I’m not blind, Alan! I know you, remember? I am offering you a solution to our problem.”

Alan knew he was staring at her. How could he not, she was a vision, and right now, she was ripping him in half, while saving him from drowning, at the same time. He could barely wrap his head around it. But she was right. They could make it work. They had to make it work. Exactly how they would make it work, well, that was a question he did not yet know the answer to, but if it had to be done, they could do it. Together.

“I love you, Katie!” And despite his best efforts to prevent it, tears started running down his face. He did not deserve this woman. Not after the way he had treated her. Not after what he had done to her, he did not deserve her kindness and her brilliant ideas to actually make this work.

“I know, babe!” Katie said, in a quiet voice. “It’ll be ok! We’ll figure out a way! Together… The three of us!”

The three of us… Alan took a deep breath. That might actually work!


End file.
